ئا: به‌هره عبدالله حمه‌تۆفیق
ئه‌وه به‌سه‌رهاتى خانه‌واده‌یه‌كى هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌ییه كه چه‌نده ئازار و ناڕه‌حه‌تیان چه‌شتووه، مامۆستا هۆگر كه كوڕى ئه‌و خانه‌واده‌یه‌یه خۆى چیرۆكى خانه‌واده‌كه‌ى خۆیانى بۆ گێڕاینه‌وه….
من ناوم (هۆگر فارس)ه و ئێسته مامۆستام له شارى هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌ى شه‌هید، خێزاندارم و دوو منداڵم هه‌یه، له‌كاتى كیمیابارانى هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌دا ته‌مه‌نم 7ساڵان بوو، به‌سه‌رهاتى ئێمه‌ش وه‌ك ته‌واوى خانه‌واده هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌ییه‌كان پڕبوو له كاره‌سات و تراژیدیاى و ناخۆشى ڕۆژانى كیمیاباران و ناخۆشیى و نه‌هامه‌تیه‌كانى دواى كیمیاباران، هه‌ندێك له‌وه‌ى به‌سه‌رماندا هاتوون خۆم به‌بیرم دێت، وه زۆرێكیشى دایكیم بۆى باسكردوم.
باوكم پیاوێكى خوێنده‌وار بوو له‌ناو براكانى خۆیدا ته‌نها ئه‌و خوێندنى ته‌واو كردبوو، زۆر ئاسانكارى بۆ منداڵى براكانیشى كردبوو بۆئه‌وه‌ى خوێندن ته‌واو بكه‌ن، شهاده‌ى به‌رز به‌ده‌ست بهێنن، سوپاس بۆ خودا ئێسته دوانیان دكتۆره و یه‌كێكیشیان پارێزه‌ره، كه‌به‌رهه‌مى ئه‌وماندووبونه‌ى باوكه‌مه كه له‌گه‌ڵ برازاكانى كێشاویه‌تى.
دایكم ده‌ڵێت: “باوكت كه‌له‌ده‌وام ده‌گه‌ڕایه‌وه تۆو برابچوكه‌كه‌ت به‌په‌له ڕاتان ده‌كرد به‌ره‌ولاى بۆ به‌خێرهاتنه‌وه‌ى هه‌ردوكتانى ده‌خسته‌باوه‌شى، دراوسێكانمان ده‌یان گوت (فارس) بۆهه‌ردوكیان به‌جارێك هه‌ڵده‌گریت چۆن ده‌توانى، ئه‌ویش ده‌یگوت له‌به‌رئه‌وه‌ى هیچكامیان هه‌ست به‌بێنازى نه‌كه‌ن” باوكم پیاوێكى زۆر هێمن و به‌وه‌فاو بوو..
یه‌كێك له‌و چیرۆكانه‌ى ژیانم كه هه‌رگیز له‌بیرم ناچێته‌وه چیرۆكه تراژیدیاكه‌ى كیمیابارانى هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌یه، ڕۆژى 16/3 كاتێك فڕۆكه‌كانى ڕژێم ده‌ستیان كرد به بۆردومانى شارى هه‌ڵه‌بجه كاتژمێر 11نیوه‌ڕۆ لایدابوو، زۆربه‌ى ماڵه‌كان خوانى نیوه‌ڕۆیان ئاماده‌كردبوو عه‌موو بێئاگا بووین له پلانه ژه‌هراوییه‌كه‌ى ڕژێمى به‌عس، نزیك ماڵى ئێمه به ناپاڵم بۆردومان كرا به‌په‌له ڕامانكرد بۆ ژێرزه‌مینى ماڵه دراوسێكه‌مان، نزیكه‌ى كاتژمێرێك له‌وێ ماینه‌وه، دواتر باوكم هات به‌دواماندا و بانگى كردینه‌وه بۆ ماڵه‌وه ده‌ستێك جلى جوانى له‌به‌ركردبوو دایكم پرسى بۆچى ئه‌وجله جوانانه‌ت له‌به‌ركردووه ئه‌ویش كردى به‌سوعبه‌ت وتى ئاخر نه‌وه‌ك جارێكى ترنه‌گه‌ڕَینه‌وه با جله جوانه‌كانمان نه‌فه‌وتێن، باوكم ده‌یزانی ته‌یاره‌كانى ڕژێم ده‌ستیان كردووه به‌بۆردومانى شار و دۆخه‌كه‌ش خراپ گۆڕاوه، گوتى شار به‌جێدێڵین چونكه وه‌زعه‌كه تێك چووه.
له‌ماڵ چووینه ده‌ره‌وه، به‌ڵام هیچ كه‌لوپه‌لێكمان له‌گه‌ڵ خۆمان نه‌برد …! چونكه باوكم گووتى: “پێویست ناكات هیچ له‌گه‌ڵ خۆتان مه‌هێنن تا گوندى(جلیله)ده‌ڕۆین و سبه‌ى ده‌گه‌ڕێینه‌وه”، به‌ڕێكه‌وتین به ته‌نیشت قوتابخانه‌ى (شنروێ) به چه‌م و دۆڵه‌دا به‌ره‌وگوندى (جلیله) و (عه‌بابه‌یلێ)، ئه‌وكاته‌ى كه‌له‌شار ده‌رچوین به بیرم دێت دوكه‌ڵ له‌كانى عاشقان به‌رزده‌بویه‌وه ته‌یاره‌كان به‌ناپاڵم بۆردومانیان ده‌كرد و ئێمه‌ش به‌حه‌سره‌ت و ترسه‌وه سه‌یرمان ده‌كرد، چه‌ند كیلۆمه‌ترێك له‌شار دوركه‌وتینه‌وه هه‌واڵى ئه‌وه‌مان ده‌بیست كه‌فڕۆكه‌كان كیمیاویان وه‌شاندووه، ئیتر دایك و باوكیشم له‌به‌رئه‌وه‌ى كاریگه‌ى ئه‌م كیمیاویه له‌سه‌رمان نه‌بێت به‌تانیان ده‌دا به‌سه‌رو چاوماندا، به‌ڵام ئه‌وه هیچ ئیستیفاده‌ى نه‌بوو، چونكه به‌هۆى باوه گازه ژه‌هراویه‌كه بڵاو بووه‌وه و هه‌ستمان به‌بۆنى ده‌كرد، له‌گه‌ڵ هه‌ڵمژینى ئه‌و گازه‌دا هه‌ستمان به بێتاقه‌تى ده‌كرد، ڕانه‌وه‌ستاین و هه‌ر له‌ڕۆیشتن به‌رده‌وام بووین تا گه‌شتینه شاخى (ئه‌شكه‌وه‌ڵ) كه‌نزیك بوو له‌گوندى هاوار، شه‌و له‌وێ ماینه‌وه، به‌ڵام به‌هۆى ئه‌وه‌ى كیمیاویه‌كه كاریگه‌رى كردبوو له‌سه‌رمان چاومان هیچى نه‌ده‌بینى، باوكم كارمه‌ندى نه‌خۆشخانه‌بوو (ده‌رمانخانه)یه‌كى بچوكمان هه‌بوو له‌ماڵه‌وه، وتى من ئه‌مه قبوڵ ناكه‌م منداڵه‌كانم به‌م شێوه‌یه چاویان نه‌بینێت و منیش به‌بێ ده‌سه‌ڵات سه‌یریان بكه‌م، ده‌گه‌ڕێمه‌وه بۆ هه‌ڵه‌بجه له‌ماڵه‌وه قه‌تره و ده‌رمان ده‌هێنم، ئێمه‌ش زۆر هه‌وڵماندا كه نه‌گه‌ڕێته چونكه بارودۆخه‌كه باش نه‌بوو، به‌ڵام باوكم هه‌ر سور بوو له‌سه‌ر بڕیاره‌كه‌ى خۆى و هه‌ستى باوكایه‌تى بۆ ئیمه ده‌جوڵا، نه‌ی ده‌توانى ئێمه به‌و حاڵه‌ته‌وه ببینێت، له‌به‌ر ئه‌وه‌ى فڕۆكه‌كانى به‌عس هه‌ر به‌رده‌وام بوون له‌سه‌ر قه‌صف كردن به‌چه‌كى قورس و ڕانه‌ده‌وه‌ستان، مامیشم كه‌زانیى باوكم سوره له‌سه‌رگه‌ڕانه‌وه‌ى ئه‌ویش بڕیاریدا له‌گه‌ڵ باوكم بگه‌ڕێته‌وه بۆ شارو هاوسه‌فه‌رى ڕێگه‌ى بێت، ئیتر باوكم و مامم گه‌ڕانه‌وه بۆ هه‌ڵه‌بجه، كه نزیك بوبونه‌وه له‌هه‌ڵه‌بجه ورده ورده دونیا به‌ته‌واوى تاریك بوو بوو، نزیك قوتابخانه‌ى (شنروێ) بوو بوونه‌وه، به‌ڵام پێش ئه‌وه‌ى بگه‌نه ماڵه‌وه ته‌یاره‌كانى ڕژێم ده‌ستیان كردبوو به‌تۆپ بارانى ئه‌وشوێنه‌ى كه‌ئه‌وانى لێ بوو، پارچه‌یه‌كى گه‌وره‌ى ناپاڵم به‌ر سه‌رى باوكم كه‌وتبوو و به‌هۆى سه‌ختى برینه‌كه‌یه‌وه ده‌ستبه‌جێ هه‌ر له‌وێدا گیانى سپاردبوو..
هه‌ر ئه‌و شه‌وه كاتژمێر 2 شه‌و باوكمیان به‌سوارى (ئێستر-وڵاخ) هێنایه‌وه بۆ (ئه‌شكه‌وه‌ڵ)، چونكه ئێمه هێشتا هه‌ر له‌وێ بووین، زۆر دونیا تاریك بوو بوو دایكم ده‌ڵیت: “شه‌و زۆر تاریك و ساردبوو هه‌ر چاوه‌ڕوان بووم باوكت بگه‌ڕێته‌وه، له‌پر بینیم وڵاخێك له لامانه‌وه تێپه‌ڕى له‌به‌ر ئه‌وه‌ى تاریك بوو نه‌مزانى كێیه و چى له‌سه‌ر ووڵاخه‌كه‌یه، به‌ڵام كاتێك تۆزێك لێم دوركه‌وته‌وه گوێم لێبوو یه‌كێك وتى به‌خاوه‌نى وڵاخه‌كه ئه‌وه‌چییه له‌سه‌ر ووڵاخه‌كه‌ت به‌م دره‌نگانه‌ى شه‌و…! ئه‌ویش وتى ئه‌وه ته‌رمى (فارس)ه واته ته‌رمى باوكى من”، ئه‌وكاته دایكم كه‌زانى بووى باوكم واى به‌سه‌رهاتووه و گیانى سپاردووه، غه‌م و په‌ژاره دڵى داگیر كردبوو، چونكه دایكم چاوه‌ڕێ بوو باوكم و مامم بگه‌ڕێنه‌وه به‌ڵام به‌داخه‌وه له‌برى گه‌ڕانه‌وه‌ى باوكم ته‌رمه‌كه‌یان بۆ هێناینه‌وه، ساته‌وه‌خێكى زۆر دڵهه‌ژێن بوو، له‌لایه‌ك له‌ترسى كیمیاباران و بۆردوومان وماڵمان وێران بوو به‌و شه‌وه سارده‌ش له‌و شاخه دابووین و له‌لایه‌كى تریشه‌وه ته‌رمى باوكممان بۆهاته‌وه، ئێسته‌ش كه بیر له‌و له‌حزه‌یه ده‌كه‌مه‌وه دڵم ده‌هه‌ژێت…
ئه‌و كاته‌ى كه باوكم ئێمه‌ى به‌جێ هێشت ئێمه پێنج منداڵ بووین سێ برا و دوو خوشك، دواى دوو ڕۆژ له (ئه‌شكه‌وه‌ڵ)بووین دواتر به‌ره‌به‌یانى 18/3 به‌كۆڵێك له غه‌م و به‌چاوى پڕ له‌گریان و به‌ترسى كیمیاباران و بۆردومان و له‌كه‌ش و هه‌وایه‌كى سارددا چووینه گوندى هاوارو ته‌رمى باوكمیان له‌گوندى هاوار ناشت، هه‌رچه‌نده گیانمان له‌مه‌ترسیدابوو چه‌ند جارێكیش ده‌وروبه‌رى ئه‌و گونده تۆپباران كرا و زۆربه‌ى ئه‌وماڵانه‌ى كه‌له‌وێ بوون به‌ره‌وه ئێران ڕۆشتن، به‌ڵام ئێمه نه‌مان ده‌توانى باوكم به‌جێ بهێڵین و ئازارى له‌ده‌ستدانى باوكم بۆ ئێمه زۆر سه‌خت بوو، له‌گوندى هاوار بۆماوه‌ى دوومانگ ماینه‌وه‌و دڵمان نه‌ده‌هات لاى قه‌بره‌كه‌ى باوكم چۆڵ بكه‌ین، دواى ئه‌و دوومانگه گوتیان ئێره سه‌ر سنوره‌و ده‌بێت به‌جێى بهێڵن و چۆڵى بكه‌ن ترسناكه، ئیتر ئێمه‌ش ڕۆشتین بۆ ئێران بۆ شارى (جوانڕۆ)، ماوه‌ى ساڵێك له‌وێ ماینه‌وه، ماوه‌یه‌كى زۆر سه‌خت بوو، زۆر به‌ناڕه‌حه‌ت به‌سه‌رمان تێپه‌ڕى ئاواره‌یى و ده‌ربه‌ده‌رى و ئه‌و ئه‌وكۆسپه گه‌وره‌یه‌ش كه‌به‌سه‌ر ئێمه‌دا هات كه وه‌فاتى باوكم بوو زۆر سه‌خت بوون، به‌تایبه‌تى بۆ دایكم زۆر ناخۆش و ناره‌حه‌ت بوو چونكه دایك و باوكى دایكم به‌جێ مابوون و (20) ڕۆژ بوو له‌هه‌ڵه‌بجه مابونه‌وه، دواى ماندوبونێكى زۆر دایك و باوكى دایكمیان هێنایه (جوانڕۆ) چه‌ند ڕۆژێك دواى گه‌شتنیان هه‌ر له‌وێ باوكى دایكم كۆچى دوایى كرد، ئیتر ئازاره‌كانى دایكم زۆر زیاتر و ئازاراوى تر و ناڕه‌حه‌ت تر ده‌بوو….
له‌ساڵى 1989 سوارى سه‌یاره‌یان كرین به‌زۆره‌ملێ ئێمه‌یان هێنایه‌وه بۆ عێراق و بۆ (باینجان)، باینجان شوێنێكى چۆڵ و ناخۆش بوو پڕِبوو له‌دڕك و داڵ، دایكم ده‌ڵێت: “ئه‌و شه‌وه باران و سه‌رمایه‌كى زۆربوو له‌وده‌شته چۆڵه‌دا نایلۆنێكمان دابه‌سه‌ر قه‌ره‌وێڵه‌یه‌كداو چوینه ژێر قه‌ره‌وێڵه‌كه بۆئه‌وه‌ى هیچ نه‌بێت باران ته‌ڕمان نه‌كات، به‌و شێوه‌یه تابه‌یانى ماینه‌وه، نزیكه‌ى مانگێكمان له(باینجان) زۆر به‌ناڕه‌حه‌تى به‌سه‌ربرد، دواتر دیسانه‌وه له‌وێشه‌وه ڕاگوێزراین بۆ (گرده‌چاڵ)، ماوه‌ى 2سالأ له‌گرده‌چالأ ماینه‌وه، سه‌ربازه‌كانى ڕژێم زۆر ئه‌شكه‌نجه‌ى ئه‌وخه‌ڵكه‌یان ده‌دا له گرده‌چاڵ، زۆر خوانه‌ناس بوون بێ ڕه‌حم و بێ سۆز بوون، له نزیك ئه‌و شوێنه‌ى كه لێى نیشته‌جێ بوین چاڵێكى گه‌وره‌یان ئاماده ده‌كرد به‌قه‌د بیابانێك وابوو، ڕۆژانه چه‌نده‌ها شۆفه‌ڵ كارى تێدا ده‌كرد و قوڵتریان ده‌كرد، سه‌ره‌ڕایى كیمیاباران و ده‌ربه‌ده‌رى و ئاواره‌یى بێئاگا بووین له‌وه‌ى كه له‌لایه‌ن ڕژێمى به‌عسه‌وه بریارى ئه‌وه درابوو هه‌موومان ئه‌وانه‌ى كه له گرده‌چاڵ بووین زینده‌به‌چاڵ بكه‌ن و هه‌موومان له‌ناوبه‌رن به‌زیندوویى بمانخه‌نه ناوى و له‌ناومان به‌رن، كاتێك زانیمان ئه‌وچاڵه گه‌وره‌یه بۆ زینده‌به‌چاڵ كردنى ئیمه‌یه زۆر ترساین، به‌ڵام په‌ندێكى كوردى هه‌یه كه ده‌ڵێت: (خوا ده‌لیلى داماوانه)، چونكه خودا هات به هانامانه‌وه و به‌هۆى ئه‌وه‌ى كه‌عێراق كه‌وته كێشه‌ى شه‌ڕى (كه‌نداو) عێراق-ئێران، ئیتر ئه‌وه بووه هۆى ئه‌وه‌ى كه‌لێبوردنى گشتى ده‌ربچێ و ئازادبكرێین و زینده‌به‌چاڵیان نه‌كردین، نه‌یانهێشت بگه‌ڕێینه‌وه بۆ هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌ى شه‌هید، ئیمه‌ش به‌ناچارى چوینه هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌ى تازه، چه‌ند مانگێك له‌وێ ماینه‌وه و له‌وێش هه‌ر نه‌یان هێشت ئاسوده بین و وازیان لێ نه‌هێناین، ئاگاداریان كردین كه‌ده‌بێت ئه‌وێش چۆڵ بكه‌ین به‌هۆى كۆڕه‌وه‌كه‌ى ساڵێ 1991 وه، ئیتر به‌ناچارى به‌پێ له‌هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌ى تازه‌وه كه‌وتینه‌وه ڕێ به‌ره‌و هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌ى شه‌هید، ئه‌و ڕێگایه به‌سه‌یاره یه‌ك كاتژمێره، به‌ڵام ئێمه له كاتژمێر 7ى به‌یانیه‌وه به‌ڕێكه‌وتین كاتژمێر 7ى ئیواره گه‌یشتینه هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌ى شه‌هید، به‌ڵام سه‌ڕاى ئه‌و هه‌مووه ده‌ربه‌ده‌رى و ئازارانه هه‌ر ئه‌و ئێواره‌یه‌ى كه گه‌شتین ئاگادار كراین كه ده‌بێت هه‌ڵه‌بجه چۆڵ بكه‌ین، به‌ڕاستى زۆر ساته‌وه‌ختێكى ئازار به‌خش بوو دواى ئه‌وه‌ى كه ئه‌و هه‌مووه ڕێگایه‌مان به پێ بڕیبوو وه زۆر ماندوو بوو بووین، ئیتر به‌بێ ووچان له هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌وه هه‌تا خاكى ئێران به‌پێ كه‌وتینه‌وه ڕێ و ڕۆشتین بۆ شوێنێك كه پێیان ده‌ووت (دووئاو)، بۆ ماوه‌ى دوو مانگ له‌وێ ماینه‌وه و دواتر به‌هۆى شكستى ڕژێم له‌شه‌ڕى كه‌نداودا ئێمه‌ش جارێكى تر گه‌ڕاینه‌وه زێدى خۆمان و هاتینه‌وه بۆ هه‌ڵه‌بجه‌ى شه‌هید…
له ته‌واوى ئه‌وه ماوه‌یه‌دا كه ئاماژه‌م به‌و ناڕه‌حه‌تى و كۆسپ و ده‌ربه‌ده‌رییانه‌ى كه هاته ڕێمان كرد، دایكم وه‌ك نموونه‌ى هه‌موو دایكێكى دڵسۆز ڕۆڵى گرنگ و دڵسۆزانه‌ى هه‌بوو، دواى وه‌فاتى باوكم جگه له‌وه‌ى نه‌یهشتووه هه‌ست به‌بێ نازى باوك بكه‌ین، به‌هه‌وڵى دڵسۆزانه‌ى په‌روه‌رده‌ى كردوین و نه‌یهێشتووه موحتاجى ده‌ستى هیچ كه‌س بین جگه له‌خودا، هه‌رچه‌نده ئازاره‌كانى دایكم زۆر سه‌خت تربوون له ئازاره‌كانى ئێمه به‌ڵام به فه‌زڵى خودا ئه‌و ژنێكى زۆر خۆڕاگر بوو توانى ئێمه به باشترین شیوه په‌روه‌ده بكات…
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