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موسوڵمان بههۆى ڕهوشتى بهرزو ههڵسوكهوتى جوانهوه له پهروهردگارى نزیك دهبێتهوه، لهگهڵ تهواوى خهڵكیدا بهبێ جیاوازى, نهبهپلهو پایهو سامان، نه ناووناوبانگ له پهروهردگار نزیك نابێتهوه، بهڵكو تهنها بۆ ئهوهى خواى گهوره خۆشى بوێ و خۆشهویستى لاى دروستكراوهكانى بكات, بهڵێ ئهوهى ڕهوشتى جوانى به عیبادهت زانى ئیدى ئهوكات به جوانترین شێوه ههڵسوكهوت لهگهڵ خهڵك دهكات، لهگهڵ ههژار و دهوڵهمهند، لهگهڵ بهڕێوهبهرو خزمهتگوزار بهبێ جیاوازى، گهر ڕۆژێك بهلاى ئهو خزمهتگوزارهدا تێپهڕى كه شهقامهكان پاك دهكاتهوه دهستى بۆ هێناى بۆ ئهوهى تهوقهت لهگهڵ بكات، له ههمان ڕۆژدا بچێته ژورى بهرپرسێكهوه ئهویش دهستت بۆ بێنێ، ئایا وهكو یهك پێشوازى لهم دوو كهسه دهكهى؟ نازانم! بهڵام لاى خۆشهویستى خوا ئهم دووانه وهكو یهك پێشوازییان لێ دهكرا! تۆ نازانى ڕهنگه ئهوهى لاى تو هیچ نرخێكى نیه و به چاوێكى سوكهوه سهیرى دهكهى زۆر باشتر و بهڕێزتر بێت لهو كهسهى كه تۆ ڕێزێكى تایبهتى لێدهگرى. خۆشهویستى خوا فهرمویهتى: “خۆشهویسترینو نزیكترین كهس له منهوه له ڕۆژى قیامهتدا ئهوانهن كه ڕهوشتیان زۆر جوانه”، لهم بارهیهوه به (ئهشجى كوڕى عبد قیس)ى فهرمووى: ئهى ئهشج دوو سیفهت له تۆدا ههیه خواو پێغهمبهرى خوا خۆشى دهوێ، ئهویش وتى كام دوو سیفهتهیه ئهى خۆشهویستى خوا؟ فهرمووى لهسهرخۆیى و نهرم و نیانییه، ههروهها پرسیارى لێكراوه له بارهى چاكهوه فهرمویهتى: “ڕهوشت جوانى چاكهیه”
پرسیارى لێكراوه سهبارهت بهوهى زۆورترین شتێك كه هۆكارى چونه بهههشت بێت چییه؟ فهرمووى: (تقوى الله وحسن الخلق) واته: خواپهرستى و ڕهوشت جوانى، ههروهها فهرموویهتى: ئینسان بههۆى ڕهوشتى جوانهوه پلهى دهگاته، پلهى ئهوانهى كه شهونویژ دهكهن و ڕۆژو دهگرن، كهوابێ ڕهوشت جوانهكان براوهى دونیاو قیامهتن، ئهگهر سهیرى ژیانى (ئوم سهلهمه) بكهین، (ڕهزاى خواى لێ بێت) جارێكیان لهگهڵ پێغهمبهرى خودا دانیشتبوو، بیرى ڕۆژیى دوایى دهكردهوه، پرسى ئهى خۆشهویستى خودا؟ ئهگهر كهسێك دوو شوى كردبێت له ڕۆژى دوایدا بۆ كامیان دهبێت؟ خۆشهویستى خودا چى فهرموو؟ بۆ باڵا بهرزهكهیان یان بو ئهوهیان كه زانستى زۆره؟ یان بۆ ئهوهیان عیبادهتى زۆره؟ نا بهڵكو فهرمووى: ئهى ئوم سهلهمه بۆ ئهوهیان دهبێت كه ڕهوشتى زۆر جوانه!
ئوم سهلهمه توشى سهرسوڕمان بوو، كاتێك خۆشهویستى خوا ئوم سهلهمه بهو جۆره بینى فهرمووى: ڕهوشت جوانى خێرى دونیا و قیامهتى بردووه، بهڵێ له دونیا بهخۆشهویستى خهڵك و له قیامهتیشدا به پاداشتیكى نهبڕاوه، بۆیه پێویسته ههمیشه ڕهوشتمان جوان بێت چۆن ههرچهند كارو كردهوهى چاكمان زۆر بێت، ئهگهر ڕهوشتمان جوان نهبێت ههمووى دهسڕێتهوه، لێرهدا خۆشهویستى خوا ژنێكمان بیردهخاتهوه، كه نوێژ و ڕۆژووى زۆر باش بووه، بگره چاكهى زۆریشى كردووه، بهڵام به زمانى زۆر ئازارى خهڵكى داوه، بۆیه خۆشهویستى خودا سهبارهت بهو ئافرهته فهرموویهتى (هى فى النار).
پێغهمبهرى خوا (درودى خوداى لهسهربیت ) هێنده پێشهنگ بووه، به ڕهوشته جوانهكانى كه بێ بڕواكان پێش موسڵمانهكان شایهتى ئهوهیان داوه، بهخشنده بووه، ڕاستگۆ و دهستپاك بووه، نهرم و نیان و لهسهرخۆ بووه، خاوهن شهرم بووه، تهنانهت كاتێك یهكهمجار وهحى بۆ هات حهزرهتى خهدیجه (ڕهزاى خواى لێ بێت) بهو حاڵهوه بینى ترس و لهرزى لێ نیشتبوو، پێى فهرموو: سوێند بهخودا ههرگیز خودا تۆ سهرشۆڕ ناكات و دهستت لێ بهرنادات، چونكه تۆ پهیوهندى خزمایهتى دهگهیهنى و ڕێز له میوان دهگرى و بهخشندهى بهرامبهر ههژار و نهدارهكان! ههر ئهوهندهش نا بهڵكو خواى گهوره پله و پایهیهكى پێ بهخشیوه، كهلهبارهیهوه دهفهرمووێ: (انك لعلى خلق عظیم)، سهبارهت بهم باسه كاتێك خواى گهوره دهیفهرموو: (واحسنوا ان الله یحب المحسینین) البقره باش دهبوو لهگهڵ گهوره بچوك، دهوڵهمهند و ههژار، كاتێك دهیبیست خوا فهرموى: (فاعفوا واصفحوا) البقرة. ئیدى لێبورده دهبوو، لهخهڵك خۆش دهبوو, كاتێك ئهم ئایهتهى دهخوێندهوه (وقولوا للناس حسنا) البقرة.. به جوانترین شێوه قسهى لهگهلأ خهڵك دهكرد، كهوابێ كه ئهم پهیامبهره پێشهنگى ئێمه بێت، دهبێت بیر له ژیانى بكهینهوه، كه چۆن ههڵسوكهوتى دهكرد، چۆن ههڵهو كێشهكانى چارهسهر دهكرد. چۆن ماندوو دهبوو له پێناوى ئاسودهیهى خهڵكدا، ڕۆژێك پێویستى ههژارێكى جێبهجێ دهكرد و ڕۆژێك بێ باوهڕێكى دههێنایه سهر ڕێگهى ڕاست، بهو شێوهیه ڕۆژهكانى به ڕهوشتى جوانهوه گوزهر كردووه، تا ئهو كاتهى ڕۆشته تهمهنهوه ئێسكهكانى لاواز بوو، حهزرهتى عائیشه باسى ئهو كاتانهمان بۆ دهكات و فهرموویهتى: ئهو كاتانهى خۆشهویست چوبووه تهمهنهوه زۆرترین جار نوێژهكانى به دانیشتنهوه بووه، خۆشهویستى خوا هێنده پێداگرى لهسهر ڕهوشتى جوان دهكرد ههمیشه دهیفهرموو: (اللهم كما احسنت خلقى فاحسن خلقى) ههروهها دهیفهرموو: (اللهم اهدنى لاحسن الاخلاق لا یهدى لاحسنة الا انت, واصرف عنى سیئه لا یصرف عنى سیئة الا انت) كهواته: ههموومان پێویستمان بهوهیه شوێن پێى ڕهوشته جوانهكانى ههڵگرین، لهگهڵ موسڵمانهكان تا ڕایان بكێشین بۆ دینى ئیسلام و لهگهڵ بێ بڕواكان تا ڕاستى دینى ئیسلامیان بۆ دهركهوێت.

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Allergic Reactions to Romance? Love didn’t give me butterflies—it gave me hives.
Book Clubs? Book clubs are wine with footnotes.
I don’t chase peace; I tiptoe toward it.
Sculpture Gardens? Sculpture gardens are rock collections with tickets.
Historical Reenactments? Historical reenactments are Halloween for history majors.
Art Snobs? Art snobs clap for blank canvases.
“Per my last email” is HR for “square up.”
Kids’ YouTube Drama? Kids’ YouTube channels aren’t entertainment—they’re tiny dictatorships.
Yard Sales? Yard sales are museums where the curator gives up.
Misfit Book Clubs? Misfit book clubs never finish the book—they just finish the wine.
Sleepwalking? Sleepwalking is exercise without credit.
Interior Decor? Interior decor is pillows staging a coup.
Football Coverage? Football coverage is commercials with touchdowns.
I don’t overshop; I adopt objects.
Digital Nomads? Digital nomads live everywhere and nowhere—mostly Starbucks.
Coffee Ritualists? Coffee rituals aren’t rituals—they’re addictions in mugs.
Emergency Kits? Emergency kits are backpacks full of panic.
Bad Tinder Bios? His bio said “sapiosexual,” but he spelled it wrong.
Bushcraft Knives? Bushcraft knives are shiny toys for dads.
Knife Nerds? Knife nerds brag about sharpness like it’s GPA.
Decluttering Gurus? Decluttering is throwing stuff out while filming it.
My humor has expiration dates.
Résumé Experts? Résumé tips just mean adding synonyms for “unemployed.”
My boundaries have customer service hours.
My Wi-Fi narrates drama.
Game Tournaments? My chess tournament ended when I realized my opponent was 8 and ruthless.
Haunted Baby Monitors? My baby monitor whispered “leave” and I left the baby.
Game Tournaments? My chess tournament ended when I realized my opponent was 8 and ruthless.
Wine Tastings? Wine tastings are just mouthwash with attitude.
Hilarious Product Reviews? Amazon reviews are therapy sessions with free shipping.
Game Devs? Game developers age faster than their consoles.
Art Museums? Art museums are quiet rooms where you pretend to “get it.”
I buy candles to apologize to my apartment.
Concert Reviews? Concert reviews are Yelp for screaming.
Coffee Ritualists? Coffee rituals aren’t rituals—they’re addictions in mugs.
I romanticize mornings the way fish romanticize bicycles.
Zodiac Dating? Dating by zodiac sign is just star-based discrimination.
Haircare Addicts? If your bathroom has more hair products than hair, you’ve lost.
Vaguebooking Drama? “Some people know what they did” is Facebook code for “I need therapy.”
Expat Struggles? Expat life is homesickness with paperwork.
I’m self-aware enough to be supervised.
Haircare Addicts? If your bathroom has more hair products than hair, you’ve lost.
Smelling Like Etsy? If you smell like Etsy, you’re 90 candle, 10 regret.
Kids Say the Darndest Things? My kid asked if the moon is just Earth’s nightlight.
I don’t hate cardio; I resent its optimism.
Yoga? Yoga is stretching with spiritual receipts.
Awkward First Dates? Going on a blind date is like ordering takeout—you don’t know what’s coming, but you’re praying it’s not undercooked.
Celebrity Baby Name Parodies? Celebrities don’t name babies—they brand them.
Content Strategy? Content strategy is planning memes professionally.
Gardening Mishaps? I planted tomatoes but harvested weeds—apparently I’m in landscaping.
Accidental TikToks? My dad accidentally went viral trying to Google “TikTok.”
Remote Control Fights? Nothing tests a marriage like Netflix and two remotes.
Awkward First Dates? My date asked about my hobbies, so I said “escaping this date alive.”
I don’t cut corners; I collect them.
Art Museums? Art museums are quiet rooms where you pretend to “get it.”
My ambition muted me.
Heat Survivalists? Heat survival is dehydration cosplay.
Dad Jokes Gone Too Far? My dad told so many puns, the family filed restraining orders.
Survival Teachers? Survival teachers charge money to starve with strangers.
E-commerce Drop Shippers? Drop shippers sell dreams with shipping delays.
Overeager Salespeople? The car salesman asked, “What do you drive now?” I said, “Away.”
Film Buffs? Film buffs watch subtitles like they’re literature.
Work From Home Struggles? My Zoom froze on the exact frame where I looked guilty.
I don’t apologize too much—sorry, what was I saying?
Pet Training? My dog’s trainer taught him to sit—but only on my paycheck.
Shopping Experiences? Trying on jeans in a dressing room is like joining a cult—you leave questioning your entire identity.
Out-of-Touch Grandparents? My grandma thinks TikTok is a clock shop.
Car Karaoke Catastrophes? I sang so badly in traffic, my GPS rerouted to shame me.
Tech Support? Tech support always asks if it’s plugged in—and it never is.
Vaguebooking Drama? “Some people know what they did” is Facebook code for “I need therapy.”
Art Tutorials? Art tutorials are instructors saying “it’s easy” as you cry.
Wild Edibles? Wild edibles are nature’s Russian roulette.
Diet Fads? Diet fads are eating disorders with PR.
Art Shows? Art shows are paintings priced higher than tuition.
Cultural Etiquette Abroad? Cultural etiquette abroad is apologizing in multiple languages.
My charisma is seasonal—winter hours apply.
History Museums? History museums are dusty reminders people always messed up.
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Pet Shenanigans? My dog won’t fetch a stick, but he’ll drag my underwear into the living room when company’s over.
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Theme Weddings? A Star Wars wedding sounds romantic until someone says “I do” in Wookiee.
Weird Dreams? I dreamed I was rich, then woke up and checked my balance for comedy.
Spreadsheets of Arguments? If you keep Excel sheets of old fights, therapy’s cheaper.
I’m brave enough to say “per our conversation” out loud.
Bushcraft Classes? Bushcraft classes are camping rebranded as tuition.
Haunted Garden Gnomes? My gnome moved three inches, and I don’t mow anymore.
I journal on receipts so my anxiety can be itemized.
Women’s Fashion Fails? Fashion week outfits prove style can survive without fabric.
Subscription Box Addiction? I don’t need 12 boxes of gourmet pickles, but they keep arriving.
Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)? FOMO is paying for parties you’ll hate.
Traffic Jams? Traffic jams prove people can sit still and still be stressed.
Diet Soda with Fries? Ordering diet soda with fries is America’s philosophy.
Bookstores? Bookstores sell guilt in paperback.
I don’t exercise; I rearrange gravity.
Crafting Disasters? My scrapbook looks like a ransom note.
Piano Lessons? Piano lessons are childhood trauma in scales.